Finding a Balance, or just something to lean on.


So many of us feel like we are walking a tightrope.  Autism can enter your life and consume it.  Soon a whirlwind of therapies…ABA, Speech, Occupational, Physical, Social Group, to name a few.  Plus parent training, potty training, homework, house work, yard work and time to work to pay the bills.  The list is endless.  Endless tasks, endless responsibilities.


And then the guilt! My Neuro-typical daughter is missing out. She’s acting out because she can’t get all of the attention she deserves. Mateo isn’t getting enough normal fun activities in his life that a typical almost 5 year old does.

So how do we balance it all?  A friend of mine was talking about a friend of her daughters who’s brother had Autism and how the girl seemed so neglected and uncared for. All of the emphasis was on her brother. I could understand what the family was going through and sympathize.

How as parents do we find a way to deal with the stress, the pressure, the guilt, the load that just keeps piling and piling on top of us? To keep our homes running smoothly, keep the flow going and to keep everyone happy.

I wish I had an easy answer.

I make myself small lists and try to tackle one thing at a time.  I let my house work and yard work fall by the wayside so that I can take my daughter out shopping for some girly time with mom.  I cancel Occupational Therapy so my son can go on a class field trip to a fun amusement park.  I through impromptu parties with friends with kids so we can all have some relaxation and fun time. Find a sitter so my husband and I can sneak off to Happy Hour or a movie.

I think all parents feel overwhelmed. It’s a tough job we have signed up for.  We want to do the best that we can.  Lean on your friends, family and anyone who is there for you.  Because they will get you through the rough patches.

And all of my friends out there who are living in the Autism world, who feel consumed and overwhelmed just know that you are not alone. You are never alone.  The road is long and seems like we are mostly hiking up hill, hell it’s a mountain, but there are many beautiful spots along that road to stop and enjoy.  Let’s embrace our beautiful children for the incredible minds they have and help them to find their path.  And know that we are doing all we can, and be kind to ourselves along this journey too. Let’s not strive for perfection but instead let’s try to find a kind of balance in the little imperfections.

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